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Post by docsammy on Jul 28, 2017 22:08:30 GMT -5
Alright, I have recently created a Fanfiction.net account that is solely dedicated to stories and fanfics based on RPG's, with an emphasis on Old-School D&D and OSR games. I have just posted the first chapter to an OD&D adventure fanfic (it features Naruto characters as the adventuring party, mainly out of a sense of nostalgia) and there's plenty more chapters to that story, along with completely original stories set in my homebrew campaign settings such as The New World and Chainmail Hearts. I will also post campaign journals styled as fanfics for any campaigns I am running. Here is my first story, titled In The Woodswww.fanfiction.net/s/12591593/1/In-The-WoodsAnd my fanfic page for these stories in general, written under the pen name Doc Sammy www.fanfiction.net/~docsammyLet me know what you guys think of the idea. |
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Post by Mighty Darci on Jul 29, 2017 7:26:48 GMT -5
How many drafts has that been through? Is it the first draft or have you been polishing it for a while. A lot there to like, but (yeah sorry) you don't have to give all the background in the first page of your story. I would work on tightening the writing and spread the background information out a bit more so it doesn't slow the reader down as much. While I understand why you want to give the physical descriptions and once you do you need to explain the blond hair and blue eyes, but I think you can find a better way to do that and it will improve the story. Also that is pretty short for a chapter. YMMV, I am pretty blunt so please don't take this the wrong way, I think this has a lot of potential.  |
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Post by docsammy on Jul 29, 2017 10:41:03 GMT -5
How many drafts has that been through? Is it the first draft or have you been polishing it for a while. A lot there to like, but (yeah sorry) you don't have to give all the background in the first page of your story. I would work on tightening the writing and spread the background information out a bit more so it doesn't slow the reader down as much. While I understand why you want to give the physical descriptions and once you do you need to explain the blond hair and blue eyes, but I think you can find a better way to do that and it will improve the story. Also that is pretty short for a chapter. YMMV, I am pretty blunt so please don't take this the wrong way, I think this has a lot of potential. The first chapter was my first draft. Future chapters will undergo further revisions. |
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Post by Admin Pete on Jul 29, 2017 20:38:51 GMT -5
How many drafts has that been through? Is it the first draft or have you been polishing it for a while. A lot there to like, but (yeah sorry) you don't have to give all the background in the first page of your story. I would work on tightening the writing and spread the background information out a bit more so it doesn't slow the reader down as much. While I understand why you want to give the physical descriptions and once you do you need to explain the blond hair and blue eyes, but I think you can find a better way to do that and it will improve the story. Also that is pretty short for a chapter. YMMV, I am pretty blunt so please don't take this the wrong way, I think this has a lot of potential. The first chapter was my first draft. Future chapters will undergo further revisions. I agree a lot of potential. Hopefully some more people will give you feedback. I substantially agree with Darci's advice. I think that is pretty good for a first draft. |
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